Internet Royalty

"Today, I asked my hip, young secretary about someone I assumed was a rapper because my 15 year old son kept discussing with his friend how much his girlfriend likes this individual. My secretary looked horrified and did not answer. I later found out why. The 'person' I asked about? Dirty Sanchez. FML"

Umm... Two things...

1. The son's girlfriend is a slut.

2. I think Dirty Sanchez is my favorite new rap artist.

"Today, as I got into an elevator, I spotted a little old lady hobbling desperately to get on. I frantically tapped on the 'door open' button but the doors closed. I got dirty looks from the people in the lift, only then did I realize I had frantically tapped the 'door close' button instead. FML."

I'm just gonna keep it real. That one was freaking hilarious. I can totally visualize some poor old woman running up to the elevator while some douche bage is vigorously punching the close button on the door. Seriously though, I wonder if she got on?

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